Help Me Please
LET’S BEGIN.
First, for anyone who is at their end, right here and right now–I’m talking about suicide–and you’ve tried all the other options and I’m your last hope… please go directly to my page called Beyond The End. Do it now.
For the rest of you, thank you for visiting my website. You’ve typed in ‘help me please’, which means you’ve gone beyond searching for a specific type of help, and your circumstances have overwhelmed you into making a more general plea: you are making YOUR DEEP CALL FOR HELP.
I’m answering. I offer sincere help throughout this site, it’s pure and it’s for free. There is no advice here, nothing to buy, no ads, no exercises or tests to take, no new things for you to ‘believe’ or ‘follow’. You can keep your religious beliefs, or lack thereof, because this is not a religious site, and yet it also includes every person in every religion.
Please read the following short introductions to the three kinds of help I offer here, and then start exploring whichever seems to meet your need at the moment.
***I hope something on my site resonates with you, maybe helps your situation, offers a little peace and some options. Please read ‘The Help Me Book’. There is so much I still need to put on this site and I apologize for so much that is missing, and I’m sorry if your situation falls into those gaps and you aren’t helped. For the time being I’m closing comments, and I’m very sorry for that as well. I wish I could personally hear every one of you. I am taking a lot of time to re-organize this site globally, and adding a lot of pages, to make it easier for you to find the exact help you are looking for. Until then, please read my present site, despite its limitations. I will take this notice down once the site is updated.
1. The HELP ME Book
There are options you have not thought about. Even the wisest, most intelligent and resourceful mind cannot think of every option. A life-saving option may be right in front of you, even within you, and because you are in such a dire state you’re not able to recognize it clearly.
There are options that can help you cope with, manage, make less painful, or solve (if they can be ‘solved’) your problems. I have heard so many people say, “I’ve tried everything!” and, “Nothing works, no one can help me!” and, “I don’t know what to do!”.
Do you really think you’ve tried ‘everything’? You haven’t come close to trying everything, and I’ll prove it here. Nothing works? Everything works in some way, you just haven’t opened to ‘everything’ in the right way. You don’t know what to do? On a certain level, you know entirely what to do; you just haven’t been able to look past your pain and fear and the noise in your head, and hear yourself.
The HELP ME Book is a shot of adrenaline for you. If you think you’re ‘at the end’, you’ve ‘hit bottom’, you’ve ‘run out of realistic options’, your ‘life is over’… please read my book. It is progressive, linear, blows apart your thought that you’ve tried everything and have reached your limit, and gives you many options you hadn’t thought about. Think of this book as a ‘primer before you reach out for more specific kinds of help’.
Remember: my book, like everything on this site, is free. Nothing to buy, nothing to learn, no exercises, no religiousness, no commercial spirituality. You just read it, and it starts to move something inside you. Note that this book is not simply a few brief website articles; this is a lot of reading, something to immerse yourself in, a big book published in web page form. Let’s begin with the Introduction.
2. THE INTERVIEWS
The most common thing you hear when you’re in difficulty or in crisis is ‘Talk to someone’. But sometimes you can’t, either because of your own limitations or because there’s simply no one around you feel you can talk to, who would be safe or helpful to talk with. So I’m bringing them to you.
These are interviews I do with people who have been through things. All kinds of people, from all areas, all ages, and all kinds of life happenings. One of the biggest blind spots of anyone who is suffering, is the feeling that you are alone, that no one understands. But if you are having deep troubles, and you read an interview, or a dozen interviews, with people who are going through similar things, you no longer feel so isolated. And you can learn, be helped, by hearing about how others have coped, even survived and thrived, through circumstances similar to what you are going through. They may not be able to listen to you in person, but by the way they share their own words here you’ll know that they would hear you if you were talking to them right now.
To read more about these interviews and how I conduct them, please read ‘The Interviews‘ page. Or you can go directly to any category under ‘THE INTERVIEWS’ heading at right, and select an interview whose title resonates with your own circumstances. Note that no interview is just about one thing; a ‘change of life’ interview might talk about some great or tragic event leading to that change; a ‘sexual abuse’ interview might talk about later problems in life resulting from the abuse. I try to loosely categorize each interview, but each one includes wider events.
I will add to these interviews constantly, so please check in at a later date, if you do not see an interview that helps you at the moment.
3. ClearYourMind.com
Usually it is a wide collection of events and decisions that bring you down a road that eventually tightens and bottlenecks into your finally asking ‘help me please’. It is invariably a combination of external happenings, and your reactions and responses to them, that brings you to either success or suffering. This is not a matter of ‘fault’ or blame, of intelligence or strength; the smartest and strongest people can still end up in a place of despair and destitution.
But your mind can evolve into something better; not every difficult circumstance in your life can be thwarted or escaped, however there are mind-tools you can use to better cope with problems, and then to deal with enough parts of a problem so that the whole is reduced in severity and becomes something manageable.
These are a random series of mind tools. Mind tools are just that: thought-tools to help your mind build into a stronger entity. You don’t have to learn any new spiritual words, there are no exercises, you don’t have to learn or remember anything here. Mind tools are simple thoughts that clarify something in your head, help your thought process evolve into something more efficient, healthy, powerful, capable. You just read them, and they start to work.
You can read them at www.ClearYourMind.com. As with this site, there are no ads there, nothing to buy, and all articles and photos are by me. Enjoy.
– – –
I hope these pages can help you. Every article on this site is written by myself, every interview is conducted by myself and the final version is approved by the person being interviewed, and the photos are all by me.
I have been in that place, of asking HELP ME PLEASE, many times in the past, for many years, and in situations I did not feel I could survive. So I think I can give you realistic and effective options.
And I hope I do that.
Thank you,
Neil
I want to say that i don’t have a sob story like the rest of them but the truth is, i do. And i hate it so much. My mother has made me experience so much mental and emotional stress that i hate her so much. I want to love her but she just keeps making me sad and angry most of the time. Today’s the worst so far. She got into a fight with my brother while we were in the car and she drove so fast and she was was even trying to make the car sway sideways. The thing is, it didn’t scare me at all. What i felt was irritation rather than fear and i don’t know if that’s even normal. I felt so pissed that in her quest for attention, she was willing to risk the lives of everyone in the car. I feel so angry right now and all i can think of is death. I’ve been imagining her committing suicide and me not even caring; infact, i imagine that I’d be so elated. I fear that if this goes on, i might do something just to feel something other than anger. Please. I’m tired of being angry.
Sofia, I have emailed you.
it’s 1 in the morning and i feel so lost, like im drowning, or screaming and no one can hear me, and i just dont know anymore. i messed up a lotttt this year. im 16, i smoked weed, stole my parents alcohol, and hooked up with a few boys. my friends are walking out on me. and my parents out and now i cant text any of my friends and i cant trust anyone and i just DONT KNOW. i changed a lot like im not gonna make the mistakes i made i learned but my parents still hate my guts and i have no one and i have nothing left in me to fight.
Mariah, I have emailed you.
I’m feeling so alone and lost, no one understands me
Emailed you, Raylen.
Wow this website helped
Thank you Jill, I’m glad. (p.s. Jill is also my sister’s name)
Am so tierd up with this life…
Not sure if i have taken good or bad decissions but my life seem to come to an end… Am not getting sleep thinking of my situation… Who is going to help me…
Feel like to die…am living in a society where i cant share things what i am going through…
Please help me
Emailed you, Samyuktha.
I typed help me please on google.
And you arrived here, and I hope something helped.
Emailed you, Yasmine.
I am so alone and lost. I want to die. I tried to take pills yesterday and couldn’t even do that right. Please help me?
Emailed you, Chris.
Need help desperately. Retired two years ago. Spinning out of control. Want to change; but, just do not seem to have the strength.
If you’re trying to ‘work’ at a change, especially later in life, it takes much energy and often you just don’t feel you have that energy or hope. And when that’s the case… then you just have to ‘Let’ change appear. When you let change, it can happen more quickly, more entirely, more gently, and more wonderfully than it ever could when you ‘work’ at it.
Emailed you.
Thanks for posting.
I’m only 15 years old and I feel suffocated. My dad died of cancer when I was 8. Around the age of 11, I regrettably started cutting myself. I haven’t done it in years but I did struggle with self-harm at the time. My mom started becoming stricter, but in an unreasonable way. One of my brothers was ticked off by the world. He’d take it out on my mom or me. He’d yell in her face, grab her wrists, or spit on her. He’d verbally abuse us. Sometime in 2012, we found out my mom was an alcoholic. She passed away two years ago. I’m living with a family friend because she’s the only one left in my hometown, where I wanted to remain. I no longer have a relationship with my family on my dad’s side. While my mom was ill, my oldest brother (who I was very close with) sued my aunt(legal guardian) and the family friend I am living with now. I had to live with him for a few months in his college town. It was horrible, he was only 19 at the time and he lived with his girlfriend. My other brother, the angry one, was also there. I was prohibited from contacting anyone at all. I couldn’t even call my own best friend when I started my period. I’d stay up until 4 or 5 every morning watching tv or reading, then I’d wake up around 7 at night. Repeat.
It was awful. I was only 13. Luckily the courts decided I could return to the family friend I currently live with. But now things are getting bad again. We constantly fight, but it’s not a typical fight that we get over easily. Since she’s not blood family, it’s like there’s no obligation to love me unconditionally. It is possible and far too likely to get fed up with each other. I haven’t been out in a while, besides school or dance practice. I have no free time. I am too scared to just sit down and have a moment because I will get yelled at. I can’t turn to my mom, like I used to be able to do. I can’t turn to my brothers. I used to be able to listen to some music and be okay, or read a great book. I used to love to write. When any of those got old, I found my own backup coping mechanisms. Drawing, dancing, singing, anything I could do to distract myself. It’s all useless now because the second I sit down to have my own time for myself, I get yelled at for not being productive. The only one that I can multitask with is listening to music but then I get yelled at for playing music. It’s like wherever I try to turn leads to the same cold abyss. I don’t know what to do. I’m stressed out. I’m not getting nearly enough sleep. My food intake isn’t consistent(but that could also be a part of being a teenager, who knows exactly what it is in this case?) I feel stuck. I want to sleep. I don’t want to die, necessarily, but sometimes I do just wish I could lay down and do absolutely nothing for as long as I need. I just want to have a childhood. Mine got cut short and i want to go to a friends house every now and then or spend an entire day sleeping and laying around. I’m fifteen, i should be worrying about whether or not i can ace the upcoming test or if i could sneak Cards Against Humanities over to a friend’s house. I do see my school psychologist, and I’ve been to several types of group therapy or counselling before. Venting is nice for a short period of time but it just doesn’t fix anything overall. I’m too scared to tell my psychologist that I fear for myself. I’m not suicidal, but sometimes I get so angry and stressed out from the family friend that takes care of me that, for a fleeting moment, I wonder what it’d be like to just not have to deal with it anymore. It’s only when I’m angry, but it’s frightening because what if I get angrier than I’ve ever been..angry enough to do something irreversible?
I’d greatly appreciate some help. I feel as though my hands are tied and I just have to deal with all of it. But I’m losing energy day by day. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this.
Thanks for venting, Kenzie. And thanks for sharing with the follow-up emails. I’m glad things are more comfortable for you now and that the above comment was just when you were at a particularly down moment about it all.
But, that’s what this website is for… when you’re in those moments.
Welcome to keep writing me to tell me how things are progressing.
I finished uni about 3 years ago and about a year ago i got my dream job however i had to relocate. So i moved out of my mums house and now i live alone in a new city. I have been here for about 10 months now and i still have not made any real friends because the town is so quite. I am ok when at work but as soon as work finishes i feel so lonely so most of the times i just sit in my car for hours when i arrive from work and then only go into my flat when its almost time for bed. I rarely have the motivation to cook so sometimes i dont eat or i just eat takeaway /leftovers. Everyday is just a real struggle and i just feel so upset. Eeveryone keeps telling me to join the gym, go out etc but i have tried all this and its really hard when you dont know anyone in the town. so i have now just given up trying to go out etc because i just end up depressed and feeling really weird and feeling like a loner when im out . I have a boyfriend who ive been with for a couple of years but he doesnt really understand and he keeps telling me the reason im in this situation is because im not trying hard enough so i just dont really tell him how i feel because he doesnt understand and i just fear he will drift away from me if he really knew how distressed i was. He visits me once a week or so but hes really busy with his own life and cant be there for me as much as i need. I have met some people but dont really feel i have much in common with them so friendships have not really developed. My research suggests that i am looking for someone i can have a stable and strong emotional connection with. I have really just given up and in the last couple of months i havent really gone out to try and meet new people because it feels like it will be a waste and i will just end up even more upset & have awkward conversations which is so much effort. so instead i just spend most my evenings browsing through social media, looking for advice online, looking for things to do in the area, and most evenings really upset. I have even started feeling hopeless about life and just wondering why i am even alive and i dont feel like i have anything to look forward to in life. On top of that there is always issues with my boyfriend and i feel really lonely because i cant really talk to him about this and when i do it just makes me feel worse because he doesnt understand and its doesnt make me feel better or make my situation any better. So i am just taking everyday as it comes but i dont actually see the purpose i feel like im just existing through life until it comes to an end and i am only 24 but i feel like i have lived for a very long time. 🙁
Thanks for the follow-up emails, Cee.
And remember: a ‘dream job’ isn’t just about pay or how rewarding or fun the work is; a dream job includes all aspects that it contributes to your life. Like living in a place you love to live, like a schedule that also allows you a great life when you’re not at work, like co-workers who you feel so good around that they almost feel like family. If you’re in a ‘dream job’ but you’re still miserable with life… it isn’t a dream job.
Thanks for posting. Thanks for the other emails. I’ve tried to address all your issues in the above comment and in your emails.