Help Me Please

LET’S BEGIN.

First, for anyone who is at their end, right here and right now–I’m talking about suicide–and you’ve tried all the other options and I’m your last hope… please go directly to my page called Beyond The End. Do it now.

For the rest of you, thank you for visiting my website. You’ve typed in ‘help me please’, which means you’ve gone beyond searching for a specific type of help, and your circumstances have overwhelmed you into making a more general plea: you are making YOUR DEEP CALL FOR HELP.

I’m answering. I offer sincere help throughout this site, it’s pure and it’s for free. There is no advice here, nothing to buy, no ads, no exercises or tests to take, no new things for you to ‘believe’ or ‘follow’. You can keep your religious beliefs, or lack thereof, because this is not a religious site, and yet it also includes every person in every religion.

Please read the following short introductions to the three kinds of help I offer here, and then start exploring whichever seems to meet your need at the moment.

Introduction: The HELP ME Book1. The HELP ME Book
There are options you have not thought about. Even the wisest, most intelligent and resourceful mind cannot think of every option. A life-saving option may be right in front of you, even within you, and because you are in such a dire state you’re not able to recognize it clearly.

There are options that can help you cope with, manage, make less painful, or solve (if they can be ‘solved’) your problems. I have heard so many people say, “I’ve tried everything!” and, “Nothing works, no one can help me!” and, “I don’t know what to do!”.

Do you really think you’ve tried ‘everything’? You haven’t come close to trying everything, and I’ll prove it here. Nothing works? Everything works in some way, you just haven’t opened to ‘everything’ in the right way. You don’t know what to do? On a certain level, you know entirely what to do; you just haven’t been able to look past your pain and fear and the noise in your head, and hear yourself.

The HELP ME Book is a shot of adrenaline for you. If you think you’re ‘at the end’, you’ve ‘hit bottom’, you’ve ‘run out of realistic options’, your ‘life is over’… please read my book. It is progressive, linear, blows apart your thought that you’ve tried everything and have reached your limit, and gives you many options you hadn’t thought about. Think of this book as a ‘primer before you reach out for more specific kinds of help’.

Remember: my book, like everything on this site, is free. Nothing to buy, nothing to learn, no exercises, no religiousness, no commercial spirituality. You just read it, and it starts to move something inside you. Note that this book is not simply a few brief website articles; this is a lot of reading, something to immerse yourself in, a big book published in web page form. Let’s begin with the Introduction.

Interview: Separating Parents2. THE INTERVIEWS
The most common thing you hear when you’re in difficulty or in crisis is ‘Talk to someone’. But sometimes you can’t, either because of your own limitations or because there’s simply no one around you feel you can talk to, who would be safe or helpful to talk with. So I’m bringing them to you.

These are interviews I do with people who have been through things. All kinds of people, from all areas, all ages, and all kinds of life happenings. One of the biggest blind spots of anyone who is suffering, is the feeling that you are alone, that no one understands. But if you are having deep troubles, and you read an interview, or a dozen interviews, with people who are going through similar things, you no longer feel so isolated. And you can learn, be helped, by hearing about how others have coped, even survived and thrived, through circumstances similar to what you are going through. They may not be able to listen to you in person, but by the way they share their own words here you’ll know that they would hear you if you were talking to them right now.

To read more about these interviews and how I conduct them, please read ‘The Interviews‘ page. Or you can go directly to any category under ‘THE INTERVIEWS’ heading at right, and select an interview whose title resonates with your own circumstances. Note that no interview is just about one thing; a ‘change of life’ interview might talk about some great or tragic event leading to that change; a ‘sexual abuse’ interview might talk about later problems in life resulting from the abuse. I try to loosely categorize each interview, but each one includes wider events.

I will add to these interviews constantly, so please check in at a later date, if you do not see an interview that helps you at the moment.

Free Your Thinking3. THE MIND TOOLS
Usually it is a wide collection of events and decisions that bring you down a road that eventually tightens and bottlenecks into your finally asking ‘help me please’. It is invariably a combination of external happenings, and your reactions and responses to them, that brings you to either success or suffering. This is not a matter of ‘fault’ or blame, of intelligence or strength; the smartest and strongest people can still end up in a place of despair and destitution.

But your mind can evolve into something better; not every difficult circumstance in your life can be thwarted or escaped, however there are thought-tools you can use to better cope with problems, and then to deal with enough parts of a problem so that the whole is reduced in severity and becomes something manageable.

These are a random series of mind tools. Mind tools are just that: thought-tools to help your mind build into a stronger entity. You don’t have to learn any new spiritual words, there are no exercises, you don’t have to learn or remember anything here. Mind tools are simple thoughts that clarify something in your head, help your thought process evolve into something more efficient, healthy, powerful, capable. You just read them, and they start to work.

You can read more about them on ‘The Mind Tools‘ page, or go directly to the Mind Tools category and select one that resonates with you. Each is a powerful tool to help you clear your mind, and clear up your life.

–   –   –

I hope these pages can help you. I won’t send you to any other websites, you can search those out on your own. Every article on this site is written by myself, every link goes to another page within this site only, every interview is conducted by myself and the final version is approved by the person being interviewed, and even the photos are all by me.

My mind is well now. But I have been in that place, of asking HELP ME PLEASE, many times in the past, for many years, and in situations I did not feel I could survive. So I think I can give you realistic and effective options.

And I hope I do that.

Thank you,
Neil

Neil

***I hope something on my site resonates with you, maybe helps your situation, offers a little peace and some options. Please read ‘The Help Me Book’. There is so much I still need to put on this site and I apologize for so much that is missing. I’m not sure when I’ll be able to add those words and I’m sorry if your situation falls into those gaps and you aren’t helped. For the time being I’m a little overwhelmed with my own life events so I’m closing comments, and I’m very sorry for that as well. I wish I could personally hear every one of you. Will open again when I can. Please read my site.

415 Comments

  • Lily says:

    i feel worthless everyday of my life. I feel like i should just go die. I am 13 but this doesn’t make a difference. i get upset with everything anyone does to me or says to me. i am always seen as the happy, smiling one and when i am quiet no one notices me. this makes me so upset and just is slowly killing me on the inside.

    • Bannen says:

      Hi Lily; what is your family like? Why do you feel you must put on a smiling face, when you really feel much different inside? Why do you not feel safe in showing who you really are and what you are really feeling? I have emailed you, but your email address did not work for me; can you write me through the Contact Me page?

  • Brendan says:

    I have recently found out that both my parents are bipolar, which it’s known that I’m at high risk because of that. But i really don’t know what my issues are. I have severe anxiety and depression, but theres also things that haunt me. Memories to be exact. Of my mothers death, the funeral, the last day i saw her. All the years she was sick and i was taking vare of her most of my childhood. They replay like a movie, on constant repaeat. I can’t focus, i cant work, and i cant so much as socialize without having a panic attack or just simply zoning out into the backround. My life is just passing me by and getting more and more messed up amd ruined. So many mistakes i cant take back. It never ends. I’ve been like this since i was 14. Almost 6 long years. And all those years i couldnt give a damn about anything. Still dont. The memories dominate my brain and shut out anything happy and good. Productive. Do i have PTSD? Or is it just severe bipolar? Or both? I just need to understand why im like this. Before its too late and i lose everything. My home included.

    • Bannen says:

      Hi Brendan, I feel from you that you have a lot of unresolved issues and feelings surrounding your mother’s death. It’s not the memories that are immobilizing you, it’s the fact that you haven’t resolved the events and feelings from them in your own mind. You need to go back and look at those happenings clearly, as an adult, with a proactive view of resolving them in your more mature mind now, rather than letting them stay there as old immature memories that are still impacting you the way they did back then. I have emailed you.

  • Aubrey says:

    I just don’t know what to do . . . I hate myself. I thought I was doing pretty well and finally got a decent job, but it turns out I have no idea what I’m doing. My boss is super critical and for some reason that only makes me make MORE mistakes. Every day I discover something new I don’t know how to do, and it’s ravaging my self-esteem. I don’t have much of a support system (my mother passed away, my sister is an alcoholic, and my father’s answer to everything is to scream at me) and I’m turning 40. I really want to drink but it doesn’t help anything. All I want is some stability. I feel like I can’t even trust myself to do the smallest things, and I’m starting to hate myself. I can’t find my worth in anything. I don’t think I can take much more of this. I have always struggled with anxiety, but right now I can’t seem to get it together at ALL. I just don’t know what I can do with myself to make money if all I do is panic.

    • Bannen says:

      Hi Aubrey; you say you don’t have much of a support system… but I’m picking up that maybe you NEVER had much of a support system. That from a young age things have been unstable for you, and you’ve never learned the ‘tools’ of stability, self worth, being really listened to, seen and heard and validated. It’s not so much about what is happening right now, right now things are just converging and perhaps overwhelming you. But I’m sensing this has been a long time coming, and stretches back to your young days. I have emailed you.

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL