Help Me Please
LET’S BEGIN.
First, for anyone who is at their end, right here and right now–I’m talking about suicide–and you’ve tried all the other options and I’m your last hope… please go directly to my page called Beyond The End. Do it now.
For the rest of you, thank you for visiting my website. You’ve typed in ‘help me please’, which means you’ve gone beyond searching for a specific type of help, and your circumstances have overwhelmed you into making a more general plea: you are making YOUR DEEP CALL FOR HELP.
I’m answering. I offer sincere help throughout this site, it’s pure and it’s for free. There is no advice here, nothing to buy, no ads, no exercises or tests to take, no new things for you to ‘believe’ or ‘follow’. You can keep your religious beliefs, or lack thereof, because this is not a religious site, and yet it also includes every person in every religion.
Please read the following short introductions to the three kinds of help I offer here, and then start exploring whichever seems to meet your need at the moment.
***I hope something on my site resonates with you, maybe helps your situation, offers a little peace and some options. Please read ‘The Help Me Book’. There is so much I still need to put on this site and I apologize for so much that is missing, and I’m sorry if your situation falls into those gaps and you aren’t helped. For the time being I’m closing comments, and I’m very sorry for that as well. I wish I could personally hear every one of you. I am taking a lot of time to re-organize this site globally, and adding a lot of pages, to make it easier for you to find the exact help you are looking for. Until then, please read my present site, despite its limitations. I will take this notice down once the site is updated.
1. The HELP ME Book
There are options you have not thought about. Even the wisest, most intelligent and resourceful mind cannot think of every option. A life-saving option may be right in front of you, even within you, and because you are in such a dire state you’re not able to recognize it clearly.
There are options that can help you cope with, manage, make less painful, or solve (if they can be ‘solved’) your problems. I have heard so many people say, “I’ve tried everything!” and, “Nothing works, no one can help me!” and, “I don’t know what to do!”.
Do you really think you’ve tried ‘everything’? You haven’t come close to trying everything, and I’ll prove it here. Nothing works? Everything works in some way, you just haven’t opened to ‘everything’ in the right way. You don’t know what to do? On a certain level, you know entirely what to do; you just haven’t been able to look past your pain and fear and the noise in your head, and hear yourself.
The HELP ME Book is a shot of adrenaline for you. If you think you’re ‘at the end’, you’ve ‘hit bottom’, you’ve ‘run out of realistic options’, your ‘life is over’… please read my book. It is progressive, linear, blows apart your thought that you’ve tried everything and have reached your limit, and gives you many options you hadn’t thought about. Think of this book as a ‘primer before you reach out for more specific kinds of help’.
Remember: my book, like everything on this site, is free. Nothing to buy, nothing to learn, no exercises, no religiousness, no commercial spirituality. You just read it, and it starts to move something inside you. Note that this book is not simply a few brief website articles; this is a lot of reading, something to immerse yourself in, a big book published in web page form. Let’s begin with the Introduction.
2. THE INTERVIEWS
The most common thing you hear when you’re in difficulty or in crisis is ‘Talk to someone’. But sometimes you can’t, either because of your own limitations or because there’s simply no one around you feel you can talk to, who would be safe or helpful to talk with. So I’m bringing them to you.
These are interviews I do with people who have been through things. All kinds of people, from all areas, all ages, and all kinds of life happenings. One of the biggest blind spots of anyone who is suffering, is the feeling that you are alone, that no one understands. But if you are having deep troubles, and you read an interview, or a dozen interviews, with people who are going through similar things, you no longer feel so isolated. And you can learn, be helped, by hearing about how others have coped, even survived and thrived, through circumstances similar to what you are going through. They may not be able to listen to you in person, but by the way they share their own words here you’ll know that they would hear you if you were talking to them right now.
To read more about these interviews and how I conduct them, please read ‘The Interviews‘ page. Or you can go directly to any category under ‘THE INTERVIEWS’ heading at right, and select an interview whose title resonates with your own circumstances. Note that no interview is just about one thing; a ‘change of life’ interview might talk about some great or tragic event leading to that change; a ‘sexual abuse’ interview might talk about later problems in life resulting from the abuse. I try to loosely categorize each interview, but each one includes wider events.
I will add to these interviews constantly, so please check in at a later date, if you do not see an interview that helps you at the moment.
3. ClearYourMind.com
Usually it is a wide collection of events and decisions that bring you down a road that eventually tightens and bottlenecks into your finally asking ‘help me please’. It is invariably a combination of external happenings, and your reactions and responses to them, that brings you to either success or suffering. This is not a matter of ‘fault’ or blame, of intelligence or strength; the smartest and strongest people can still end up in a place of despair and destitution.
But your mind can evolve into something better; not every difficult circumstance in your life can be thwarted or escaped, however there are mind-tools you can use to better cope with problems, and then to deal with enough parts of a problem so that the whole is reduced in severity and becomes something manageable.
These are a random series of mind tools. Mind tools are just that: thought-tools to help your mind build into a stronger entity. You don’t have to learn any new spiritual words, there are no exercises, you don’t have to learn or remember anything here. Mind tools are simple thoughts that clarify something in your head, help your thought process evolve into something more efficient, healthy, powerful, capable. You just read them, and they start to work.
You can read them at www.ClearYourMind.com. As with this site, there are no ads there, nothing to buy, and all articles and photos are by me. Enjoy.
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I hope these pages can help you. Every article on this site is written by myself, every interview is conducted by myself and the final version is approved by the person being interviewed, and the photos are all by me.
I have been in that place, of asking HELP ME PLEASE, many times in the past, for many years, and in situations I did not feel I could survive. So I think I can give you realistic and effective options.
And I hope I do that.
Thank you,
Neil
Some days, are okay. Until there’s some kind internal switch that’s flipped and I start just don’t want to feel anymore. At times I don’t even want to leave my apartment, talk or do anything… There’s such a lack of motivation within myself that frightens me, a listlessness I just don’t understand. I have support, I know I do but, I don’t reach out for it. I refuse it, not wanting any help which is even more damning because I don’t want them to know about this black hole. To make them look at me differently. I hate it, I hate it so much. …I just want to be hopeful again, to be happy…
I feel exactly the same, I have everything and more than someone my age could ever want.. But out of the blue I just cry and I feel so sad and jhopess and just broken but I don’t ever know why.. My other half says he understands but he never really does.. He thinks I can just think happy thoughts and it will go away.. But it’s not like that.. It’s like two separate parts of me and this one is always just under the surface ready to latch on to any negative feeling and drag me down further.. I can’t comprehend it.. I need help but I don’t know what from
I’m so messed up at the moment I don’t know what to do, I don’t even know where to start, personally I don’t think talking to anyone will help, explaining why I’m so pathetic will likely make it worse, but it’s here or a “professional” and I’d rather not go down that road.
Emailed you.
Talking to the right person is not about ‘explaining why you’re pathetic’. There are things that are causing you an emptiness and suffering inside. If you’re talking to the right person, they’ll know that and will talk proactively with you about options, not about making overall judgements such as ‘pathetic’.
You’re a human. You’re suffering. You have issues. Your issues are corroding your life and happiness.
There are options, there is help, there are solutions to much of that.
Read my course.
And thanks for the follow-up email giving me more details. Hope I am helping in some way.
I am so confused. I don’t even know who I am anymore. I have many reasons to be happy but still, I’m not. Stress, school, social life. Their all too much. I can’t handle it anymore. I wake up every single day thinking about why I’m still alive or why can’t I just die. No one needs me and no one cares. I feel weak, tired and hopeless.
I started planning my death. I wrote notes, some still unfinished. I wanted to give it to them but no will care.
I don’t want to kill myself, I just want to die. I’m still searching for hope.
Emailed you.
The ‘many reasons to be happy’ are not working for you, you obviously are not getting something deeper that you need in order to start feeling better about life and yourself.
Saying ‘no one needs you and no one cares’ is quite an all-encompassing statement, and if you look deeply into your relationships I think you’ll find that statement isn’t so all-encompassing after all.
But the main point is: the people around you aren’t giving you the validation you need, in order for you to feel worthiness, like you matter. Please read my chapter on ‘Validation’ – and start opening to finding it from other sources, rather than the sources you’ve been stuck with so far in your life.
And you need to move beyond that empty feeling simply because others don’t validate your worthiness. You need to move into self-validation. Consider what validation is, and consider how to begin doing it for yourself. I am writing a follow-up chapter called ‘Self-Validation’ eventually, since it is probably the most requested topic out of all the emails I’ve gotten asking me to write further chapters for the course.
Hey…I’m not really sure what to say…I just feel really lost. I feel like crying most of the time, but I hold it in. I used to be able to connect with people…but now I look at them, and I just feel so alone. It’s like I’m in a different world…and they don’t see me anymore. It’s like I don’t exist for them anymore. I don’t talk to my family anymore…I’m out of the house most of the time, roaming the streets…I’m just so tired of life…I tried cutting and suicide…but I’m trying to hold on…sorry if this bothered you or if I wasted your time in any way.
Emailed you Illyana, and thank you for the ongoing email exchange and for sharing. You’ve been growing and have become an unusual person who your parents really don’t understand. And that causes a disconnect, almost a feeling of abandonment, even when you’re with people who care about you. It causes that disconnect simply because they don’t understand enough about what you’re going through and who you’re becoming.
And you don’t know these things about yourself, either, so it’s not like you can tell them about it clearly. It’s a mystery and a disconnect from all sides.
But as I say to anyone who’s going through changes that cause any kind of disconnect: those changes are some inner part of you nudging you to explore and open to them. When you do that, over time understanding will come to you. And as you discover your own understanding of who you’re becoming, you’ll learn to share it clearly with those around you.
Hey, i just feel really really lost. I am one of the first people in my family to go to college, university and do extra training to get me into a great marketing job. I job i had the privilege to choose.. A privilege that I am really not feeling. I thought i was ambitious but i feel like quitting everyday. I am sad every day, I complain every day. I feel stretched beyond belief, have hardly any money to show for it and have a strained relationship with my colleagues. The strained part has been an issue in every single job I’ve ever had (except a bar) yet in my social life I am mostly at ease. In regards to work I feel like I am failing and falling into a deep dark hole and i don’t know in what direction to turn. I don’t know if its the work i don’t enjoy or that I am not supposed to be at a desk all day. Either way it is grinding me down so badly it’s affecting my confidence and direction in life. 26, still broke, still at home and have no idea what I’m doing. This area of my life is making me feel like I am loosing a grip of everything. Help!
Emailed you, englishgirl.
So much is wrong that I could write books about it all. Help me please.
Emailed you, Michael.
So, write those books. Writing is an amazing format in which to clarify things you are going through, and in my case, things from the past. Write as journals or diaries to warm yourself into the writing skills, then later you can develop more professional skills and take those early fresh writings and polish them so they’re readable and helpful to others.
Thanks for the reply emails and for sharing.
I didn’t know what to expect when I typed those three words into Google. This wasn’t it, though.
I’m so tired of everything.
Emailed you, Frankie.
What were you expecting, when you typed in ‘help me please’?
Thanks for sharing, in the follow-up emails.
Emailed you, Jasmine.
Hi
I need help! I promised God a few years ago I will never try to comit suicide again, but I struggle with that thought so much, I can’t stop thinking of it, I’m tired SO tired of life!
Emailed you, Anna.
I truly don’t know where to start or whether anyone will be willing to read without judging me, but for the last few years I’ve not gone a week without planning suicide or wishing for something to just end it all. I see nothing to look forward to. My future just does not seem to offer anything better than the past or present. Some of my plans have been set into motion, but all the things I tried failed to work. No one I know, knows anything about my thoughts or attempts, I don’t want them to know, I don’t want to be stopped, I just want someone to listen to my reasons for wanting to give up and give in. I’m damaged and everything I do and all people I bring into my life nowadays just seem to help me further self destruct.
Emailed you, Mich.